Power Of Women | Sisterhood Sharing Sessions | Life Lessons Learned: Best Practices For Life-The Power Of Resignation And Deliberation
What I’ve Learned
“The practice of embracing the Power of Resignation and Deliberation within myself was a great method of survival for me.”
~Debra Benson, North Carolina-Sisterhood Share Club Contributor
The Power of Resignation And Deliberation Within Oneself
Major Dilemma
Are you facing a major dilemma or disappointment in your life? Maybe unemployment, divorce, financial setback, relational, or homelessness … If you can identify – my heart goes out to you. I too have been through some weighty misfortune in my life, as well. Pushing through and bouncing back was not a walk in the park. While I may not know your particular story, what I do know is that the way we perceive or manage a difficult experience impacts the measure of its power over us. In the following paragraphs, I will share with you how I made it through, and the method I used to recover. I hope it will be of help to you now or in the future.
Unknown Territory
In 2015, I came face-to-face with the ramifications of being well over 50 and unemployed. The setbacks from unemployment caused me to feel apprehension about what, when, and how to move forward. Affordable Housing – Entrepreneurship – Fixed-Income – Semi-Retirement – Supplemental Income. By the second year of a dead-end “J.O.B” employment search, and an entrepreneur venture lacking sustainable financing, the handwriting was on the wall – I had to move into unknown territory. I had no other choice than to deliberately and unapologetically do what I had to do. I had to take ownership of the situation. I had to embrace The Power of Resignation and Deliberation within Myself.
Retire The Power Of The Disappointment
The first thing I had to do was to purposefully address my dilemma, and retire (i.e. resignation) the power of the disappointment. I had to accept it and begin to do significant downsizing of bills and baggage (i.e. material and personal). The biggest part was letting go of my beautiful home. Consequently, for two and a half years I lived between houses, with family and friends. I felt like something of a vagabond. Even though I was thankful for the graciousness of my family and friends, it was definitely not what I was accustom to when living on my own. All the material comforts, privacy, and freedoms I was accustom to where gone. Nevertheless, this is what I had to do while I figured out what, how, and when I might be able to bounce back.
The Power Of Resignation
Once I was able to embrace the power of resignation, I was able to get very still, and begin the deliberation within myself. Most of all, I needed to focus on the defining answers and lessons to be learned. Digging deep exposed things within me: fear, anger, and often despondency, which sometimes rendered me into a sunken state of inertia. At one point, I could no longer locate my desire to exist. Rock bottom finally came, when I found myself exhausted, and crying into my pillow many nights, pleading with God to just take me in my sleep. Oh, BUT GOD. Things began to turn around. I found confirmation in my quiet times with just God, nature, and me. I took advantage of my time of stillness. I turned off the phone, pushed back from Facebook, and restricted my public availability. My daily routine included walks (rain or shine), alone time, and stillness before God, and within myself. This calculated time alone enabled me to cope and grow more effectual with my decisions.
A Place Of Transition
In retrospect, it was not until I resigned myself to give it all up, that I would finally arrive at what has come to be a place of monumental transition for me. The experience enabled me to realize that my setback was really a setup for something grander. Today, I live a resilient life of peace, joy, and simplicity. I am more aware of what is of greater importance for me. Most of all I continue to use this method on a regular basis in my life. The practice of embracing the Power of Resignation and Deliberation within myself was a great method of survival for me. Maybe it can be of assistance to you as well.
My name is Debra – I am an eagle – It’s My Time to Fly.
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~Debra Benson, North Carolina-Sisterhood Share Club Contributor/Contributing Member
Submission Date: 12.22.18
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Your Lesson is powerful and enlightening. This will resonate with many people.
Thank you for sharing.
Thank you!
I love and read often this story – my story – which today December 31st marks the end of my 3 year journey of Resignation and Deliberation. My hope is that others that may read this will find something that may help them, or someone they know, with tips for pressing through difficult situations they may face in life. This time last year I was unemployed and waiting on affordable housing. Today I am living a resilient and peaceful life. I continue to encounter life lessons that are not always a walk in the park – but this practice continues to prove to be a great tool and way of escape.